Love 14

One of my favorite photos of them

My father-in-law often called me Nna, which is Ann backwards. He came up with these seemingly random nicknames, but always with their own quirky backstories that become more endearing than funny. When I lived with them he left notes every now and again and they'd open with, "Dear Nna..." When we'd come to visit he'd smile really big and say outloud, "Hey, Nna!" and followed it with a big hug and a kiss. This is how Dad was. He had very real, very apparent love and affection towards his family, his children, and especially... his wife. I'd watch as he'd come home from work, walk right up to Mom, reach out his arm, pull her close and give her a kiss. Every time. He wouldn't just walk over, lean in, kiss her on the cheek, and turn around. He was very deliberate. He'd look right at her and smiled happily as if they've been apart for a week. They've been married close to 50 years. When he was able to finally talk in ICU, as Mom walked in he said to her, "God, am I glad to see you."  ♥

I took this photo right before we all drove up to the snow.

That kind of love with Dad was almost involuntary. Like breathing. He didn't think about it, made no apologies, and what may be regarded a weakness, was quite possibly his biggest strength. Something I also see in his son, my husband and one of the greatest things about Aaron... above all else his unconditional, very real, involuntary love for us. So thank you for leading by example, Dad. 

Having said goodbye to my dear Father-In-Law and my wonderful Aunt Ginny at the same time, after the family recently had to also say goodbye to Aunt Betsy, made these days quite heavy. It's also not too long after the news that the world lost Whitney Houston, and now Davy Jones of The Monkees. As a big fan of The Monkees, I was unexpectedly also affected by the passing of Davy Jones as he was an icon in my own life. I only bring this up to say that as I was at a huge loss of comforting words to my family in our time of grieving the loss of an icon in my husband's and family's lives, my sister, Charlene, posted something very sweet on Facebook in regards to my father-in-law, Dennis, and my aunt Ginny. She included a quote by Mike Nesmith, the Monkee with the beanie. She didn't complete the quote, but what she posted was enough for me to be affected by what it said and I searched to find the quote in its entirety. I was very comforted by what he said and it was in Mike's words about Davy that I'm able to express exactly what I want to say to my family and friends. And it is this (I'm replacing Davy's name)...

"While it is jarring, and sometimes seems unjust, or strange, this transition we call dying and death is a constant in the mortal experience that we know almost nothing about. I am of the mind that it is a transition and I carry with me a certainty of the continuity of existence. While I don't exactly know what happens in these times, there is an ongoing sense of life that reaches in my mind out far beyond the near horizons of mortality and into the reaches of infinity. That they have stepped beyond my view causes me the sadness that it does many of you. I will miss them, but I won't abandon them to mortality. I will think of them as existing within the animating life that insures existence. I will think of them and the family with that gentle regard in spite of all the contrary appearances on the mortal plane. Their spirit and soul live well in my heart, among all the lovely people, who remember with me the good times, and the healing times, that were created for so many, including us. I have fond memories. I wish them safe travels."

♠