These ARE the Droids you're looking for!

 

Motorola Droid X in current condition.

And still kickin' bum like a Jedi!

Do you see the screen? If you can't tell because the edges on the phone are black, you can see blackness creeping in around the sides, too. So much so that I can barely see what I'm reading unless I keep scrolling in all directions. This phone has been dropped, spilled on, stepped on, tossed (and lost), and still, all functions and features were unaffected. The straw that broke this camel's back (or in this case, gave the face its crack) was a drop from a distance at combat speed in my home! And even STILL! The only thing that happened was a hairline fracture I could barely notice! The blackness only slowly crept in over a couple of months and I had no issues with the phone otherwise. Not one. Nothing. Nada. Zilch, zero, zip!

The Droid X pretty much kicks ass and I don't need anything more than what it has provided... and then some. However comma! Timing has opened up a door to not only get one with a good screen, but also a significant discount for Black Friday! The practical part of me asks, "Why spend money on a new phone when you're happy with the current model?" The every other part of me asks, "Why the hell not...?" If the Droid X kicks this much bum and with the Black Friday discount I can upgrade my phone to the Motorola Droid Razr! With a Gorilla Glass face and Kevlar back, I am most certainly going to jump on that transaction! With the current condition of my phone (and obvious clumsy tendencies), I can stand to own one with reinforced everything!

INTERJECT: The Motorola Droid site freakin' rocks!!

After few conversations with hubby, friend, and self (Hi, Self! Oh, hey!) and reading up on two of Verizon's newer badazz phones I've opted not to wait for the Samsung Galaxy Nexus (though quite a pretty, pretty gadget!). Yes, it does offer the new Android OS 4.0 Ice Cream Sandwich, but come 2012, it will also be available to Razr users. So... OS problem? BS. Besides, there is always going to be a bigger, better, badder, stronger, sexier, savvier (yes, savvier) phone. I'll go ahead and get the Razr now and wait for said phone to manifest in the future. Perhaps at some point it'll transform into a stellar Z07 Corvette! What...? It could happen!

Oh, and I have nothing against the Nexus. At all. And for the iPhone diehards, I have no real input for the iPhone 4S other than I like the look of the Droids better. I've never owned an iAnything and I've been perfectly happy so far.

Motorola Droid Razr Vs. Samsung Galaxy Nexus

Know this...! DROID is a trademark of Lucasfilm Ltd. and its related companies and used by Motorola with permission! So there it is. These are the Droids you're looking for!

DROOOIIID...!

Dream Log #2

This dream was very colorful, included several of my YouTube friends and acquaintances, and ridiculously random!

Here goes...

Two guys were putting together an improve show only I didn’t realize it going to actually be in front of people. It was to be held in this room on some school campus. At first it was just me, Jessica Lizama, and one other person. Not sure who that was. Hubby was with me and was waiting for me outside the room in what looked like a dressing room with a mirror surrounded by “Hollywood lights” (those round bright bulbs you see in dressing rooms). Suddenly I’m on a grassy field and Iman Crosson runs up joking with me about the improv show and that he had his tickets. That’s when I realized it was in front of an audience. At that point I had anxieties over the fact I wasn’t even sure what I would do since I’ve never done improv in front of anyone. We’re back at the room and there are a few more people in it. I go out to tell hubby it’s $27 if he wanted to watch the show and if not I’ll be quick if he wanted to wait. At first he decided to just wait.

I’m now walking the campus hallways and there was a group of 3 people, a journalist, a camera person, and one other person. They were talking about the show and capturing random footage around the campus. As I’m walking, I pass Meghan Tonjes, also scheduled to be part of the show, who tells me something about why there’s a film crew and to act naturally. So as I’m walking there are other participants just casually walking passed the camera so I follow suit. It was apparent Meghan was irritated with me. I’m not sure why, just that she was. Her hair was long, a bit below her shoulders and she was wearing a white blouse and khaki capris pants.

We’re back in the room now and Jessica’s wearing big sunglasses, jeans, and a black t-shirt that had a word on it that had something to do with improv comedy. Not sure what it said but the word started with the letter “S” and was in white block letters. Someone said she and I were wearing the same kind of shirt so I look down and was wearing a deep, bright blue shirt with black block letters. Different word, but also had to do with the show. Someone was making fun of Jessica for wearing flip flops with her jeans and t-shirt. Apparently she wore slippers with everything so they made that comment behind her back.

I look into the room and Chris Cendana is practicing for the show. Suddenly he is actually performing. Not sure which song he’s singing, but he was playing guitar, singing, and I was sitting next to him on this off-white, puffy, leather couch and he was using a thin, angled makeup brush to apply purple lipstick to my lips as part of his act. He had no shirt on and appeared as if he worked out on steroids. Not solid muscle, but that thickness that was obvious he spent time in the gym often, just not cut. Suddenly he was now painting his own lips and as he sang I was doing backup harmony while helping him apply this lip paint. Instead of purple it was a lighter lavender color.

Now I’m walking over to the back of this small room where the audience was. Lisa Lavie is sitting next to my hubby trying to take pics with my cam and my new light diffuser for my flash. She was in a great mood and was asking me if she was doing it right. I took the camera to see how she was snapping photos and I started using it. I was very appreciative that she was actually taking photos. Usually I’m the one with the camera and not in many of the pics. (This is what I was thinking in the dream.)

It’s Lisa’s turn to perform so I start trying to take pics. She’s dressed in a fancy, beautifully ornate leotard and her performance was singing much like Christina Aguilera in the movie Burlesque. There were two guys on either side of Lisa dressed in mostly white with their face painted in black and white with shimmer paint and had white feathers surrounding them. I was sitting on the edge of the off-white puffy couch with really great shots through my lens only the camera wouldn’t click. The button seemed to be sticky and as I looked through the lens the diffuser actually also covered the lens with a small hole for the aperture. I had to find Lisa through the small hole in the diffuser. I had some incredibly beautiful shots and Lisa made sure to look my way knowing I was taking pics. I was frustrated because I missed so many gorgeous close-ups of her performance because the cam wouldn’t click!

It’s now the second part of her act, no singing. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail and she was in the same leotard with dark stockings and black shoes. She was doing some sort of act where she lined up a bunch of firecrackers along the front of the stage and she was to light them. She ended in splits and the firecrackers, which looked like the dynamite sticks with the long wicks, started lighting up. People were very impressed but towards the end there was some female on stage with a large Ziploc baggy full of more of the firecracker sticks that started lighting up. Now Lisa and other people were stomping on them to try to put them out.
This whole time I’m still thinking, “If Chris can sing, Meghan can sing, and Lisa can sing and dance, I guess I don’t have to perform some sort of improv comedy… but what will I do?”

That's pretty much it. I woke up and it was light outside. It was the last dream just before I awoke. And no, I never got the chance to perform.

Dream Log #1

My dreams tend to be random and vivid. People have suggested I start logging them. Perhaps someone else out there can make sense of 'em. I invite you to the craziness that seems to be whirlwinding through my subconscious. Here's the first one!

This isn't where the dream begins, but where my memory of it does.

I'm standing in front of a really tall, big yellow sink pooling up with clean water. I use a flat rubber matt thing to push the water back towards the sink. It goes into the sink, but the sink is keeps overflowing... but won't spill over. I turn to say to my friend, Michelle, that the sink is overflowing and she gets up from the couch, walks over to the sink unaffected (she's usually pretty quick and hands-on). She's wearing a brown & white tie-dye casual dress that ties around her neck (much like one she wore to a recent tropical party we had). She puts her elbow on the sink and rests her chin on her hand and casually says, "it's filling up?" Then falls asleep. Seconds later she walks to the couch and sits next to her hubby. I had to go so my son and I had to board a big boat to leave. The boat had multiple decks and was white. It's docked on the beach right outside of this place. It was obviously late afternoon by the placement of the sun and the ocean seemed calm. My son is on the boat and I missed it so to catch up I get on this other boat. It was brown and seemed upside down. Like it was turned over and I was floating on the bottom of it. I couldn't catch up fast enough so I use my hands to paddle. As I was approaching this big boat wasn't a big boat, but started submerging like a submarine and the waves were pushing up the sides of it as it went down.

That's as much as I remember before I woke up.

Taking Ownership

I don't blame anyone for the choices in my life and I'm very proud of most of the choices I did make. I feel like I've already accomplished so much in my life, and have been exposed to so many new things and people, despite not having established myself as a professional entertainer (a dream I've had since I was a kid). I've had some pretty bad days and have blamed "the powers that be" for any shortcomings. What I realize is that I am the powers that be. I have full control of my choices or any of my actions leading up to the end result. That's not to say, let's be clear, that I don't put my faith in God's hands when I submit to having lost control in tougher times. I also thank God for the blessings in my life... and the reason I do have free will.

Recently I disconnected with someone I love and care about; someone very close to me. There were some frustrations leading up to it and who's to say we can ever reconcile our differences. Comments about what was referred to as my "perfect life" were put out there in a way that I think was meant to be offensive. Well, my life is not perfect. My life, however, is my life... and it's the closest thing to perfection for me as it is a result of my own choices. I make no excuses for my life or who I am and I certainly am not apologetic about it either.

If my actions lead you to believe that you are less of a mother, a friend, a person... that is your choice. Don't put that on me. I absolutely don't believe this to be true. If you feel my life and my decisions are the reason behind your insecurities, there is nothing I can do because that's your choice. You are also in control of your actions. Initially I felt angry, of course, and after a week of distracting myself with... oh, who am I kidding, I'm always distracted. These distractions have helped me to think about other things and ultimately come to the conclusion that the fight was ridiculous and not worth another hurtful thought. So without hesitation I attempted to make peace for the second time with no response. The first attempt was probably ill-timed as it was right before the car backed out of the driveway. The second, a week later, was today. I called... no answer. I left a voicemail... no response.

My intentions are to make peace and move forward. I believe the ball is now rolling across the opposite court as a paddle has not even been raised to strike. I apologized for my part in the riff. My intention is not to be right, but to make it right. My intention is not to grovel, beg for mercy, or accept blame to spare your ego. The miscommunication was both of ours. I've said my peace and I have to let it go.

It's in my nature to keep my relationships static-free, as I tend to be a people-pleaser and a perfectionist, with a desire to impress everyone. (Meh, self-esteem issues.) That said, I prefer to take ownership for my own actions. Don't expect me to take ownership for yours, too.

Invictus is a poem by William Ernest Henley, 1875, and reading this puts me in check. So I'll end the blog with these powerful words...

Out of the night that covers me

Black is the pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever gods may be

for my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

my head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the horror of the shade,

And yet the menace of the years

finds, and shall find me, unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

how charged with punishment the scroll,

I am the master of my fate;

I am the captain of my soul.

Featured!

I was featured on Mevio.com's Women of YouTube! This is actually the second time. Yay! The producer of the web site contacted me and asked me if I would mind if they featured my video clips.

Would I mind?? Um... NO! LOL!

He's been very cool and I am flattered they want to feature me again. That just rocks.

You can check out the video by clicking on the title link!

edit: 4-20-09

I updated the link. Since this post there were two more videos added on Mevio. How cool is that! :)

Striking a Chord

... Or three or four!

I picked up my guitar again and will spend some time each day, even if it's only 10 minutes, practicing, building up my callouses and learning new songs. I want to start posting my acoustic videos again. So much fun and I love to play! After all this time I am still learning how to read tabs. The songs I played with our band are the only ones I know. When I learned them I relied on my memory to look at the tabs and play. So basically when I looked at each chord on that sheet I knew where to place my fingers... if I were to pick a random tab off the 'net it would be tough for me to read it and play it. Odd, I know, and I'm probably not explaining that with much clarity but there it is. Now I pick songs I know I want to learn and it will take me forever to read each chord and place my fingers! I'll get it, though.




This is my acoustic. It's an Ibanez AE Series Cut Away Acoustic-Electric. I can play it acoustically or plug it into an amp. It's got such a rich, full sound. I love it! It also has a built-in EQ on top and a fire rosette detail shown in the last two photos. (You can click on any of the photo thumbnails for a larger view.)




This is my electric guitar. It's a Fender Stratocaster. I love the color! Originally it had a plain white pick guard with white knobs. I switched them out for a red pearl pick guard and chrome knobs with white pearl caps. Beautiful! I love playing "Leave Me Lying Here" by Veruca Salt!

I'm That Spade Girl

After several excruciating minutes of trying to find an identity here without using my real name... again, I decided to go with something sentimental and catchy. Well, in the 60's "That Girl" was a popular show starring Marlo Thomas as Ann Marie. My mother loved that show and she named me after Marlo's character. So I am now (and have always been)... That (Spade) Girl.

Ahh... It's fitting, it's different, aaaaand it's done.

I also spent some (not so excrutiating) time searching for an image to post with this blog. I couldn't just take the first one I saw... or the fifth one for that matter. As usual, when given too many choices I tend to take my time going through too many of them. Hey, this (Spade) girl's got to make an educated decision!

What's cool is that in my search for the perfect image I found that the DVD collection exists! (I chose this image since it was the cover to the first in the series.) With Mother's Day fast approaching... how can I not send them to my mom! So I guess now you'll know what I'll be doing once I post this blog. Ssshhh! Don't tell Mom. It's a surprise!

Amazon, here I .com! (See what I did there?)